Mother seemed to be in a deep sleep when we arrived just before noon yesterday, but I kept gently touching her face and arm. She kind of mumbled, so I knew she was hearing me.
Before long she said she needed to go to the bathroom. I put the call bell close to her hand and asked her to push the button. (We try not to do everything for her.) Soon the light lit up, so I knew she was successful – and complimented her. When a nurse came, we left the room so she could put Mother on the bedpan.
When the nurse left, she told me I could go back in the room. Cerwin chose to stay in a waiting area near her room to give her privicy. After a while Mother pushed the call button to notify the nurse that she was finished.
When the nurse came to the room, I asked if I could help – or did she want me to leave. The nurse said, “I would really appreciate help.” She asked me to put on some plastic gloves – and I became a nurse’s assistant by removing the bed pan, getting a new bed pad, handing her cream (to help prevent bed sores) and pillows to lift her feet and elbows from the bed.
Soon I helped move Mother closer to the head of the bed (she gravitates toward the bottom) in preparation for lifting the head of her bed for lunchtime.
I leaned in toward Mother and told her, “I am your new nurse today.” I loved the smile in her eyes and on her face as she said, “I love this new nurse” and puckered her lips to give me a kiss. Oh I treasure that moment.
The nurse said, “Ella, it is so good to see you smiling. I think we need to hire this nurse.” I promised Mother that I would only work for her. 🙂
Then it was time for lunch. She didn’t eat very much, but Cerwin and I took turns feeding her. Her food is pureed, so we always ask the kitchen attendant what she is eating – then as we feed her, we tell her what we are putting in her mouth.
Because she was still alert, I asked if she wanted to talk to Velda. She did.
We (her family) have had several visits this week where Mother was sleeping or very groggy. (However, when Velda called last night, she told us that she and Mel also had a great visit at suppertime. After Velda read some Bible verses to her, Mother sang a song, then another one. )
We treasure these moments as we watch her slowly slip away from the earth. At this point we don’t know if we have only days or maybe months to enjoy her presence.
Then we called her 100-year-old brother John – who has been asking about her. I listened so I could assist with the conversation when necessary.
It was a good day, and I wanted to keep it in my memory and share it with you.
We covet your prayers for her – and us.
Praying for all of you at this difficult time. I know that you rejoice, though, knowing that Heaven is waiting for her!
Yes, we are grateful to know that Heaven is waiting for her. Some days we pray that she could just peacefully die in her sleep – but we also want to be with her when she leave.
Yes, praying for you all. Thank you for sharing this time of grace
Thanks for praying.
I think is is so blessed to be passing onto the next life surrounded by family.
Yes, it seems far better than not having family around.
This is such a difficult time, not knowing how much more time you will have with her. I’m glad you are close by and can visit often!
Sometimes we wish she could just go home to the Lord in her sleep, but other times we hope that we can all be with her when she leaves this earth.
I know that feeling — I hope that she will go quietly when the time comes, and not be in undue pain. Hospice people told me that everybody does it in their own way — some wait till everybody is there; others wait until they have all left!
Cerwin’s Dad waited until everyone left the room. I stayed behind, while the others went to another area of Landis Homes to look for blankets and a place to sleep as it was the middle of the night. Within a few minutes Daddy died – and he had been in a coma for several days.
Doris, It only seems like yesterday I was doing the same things you are doing for Aunt Ella, as I did for her sister.May the sisters be reunited again someday. Praying for you and the family as you walk this path .
As you know, it is rewarding to be with them as much as possible during the days when they are weak.
I am and will be praying. Be sure to get hospice when it’s near the end. They can prescribe meds to keep her comfortable. We didn’t do that with Tom’s mother (didn’t know they would come to a nursing home), and she suffered terribly at the end because no one could reach her Dr. to ask him to prescribe something. Gracia
They are doing a fabulous job of keeping her comfortable.
Just a short time ago I was there when my mother passed. It’s so nice of you and your family to be there for her, as I’m sure that’s where you desire to be at this time. She seems like such a sweet lady. I almost feel like I know her since I’ve followed your posts for so long!
She is very pleasant and delightful to visit when she is awake. She was awake again today when we were there. However, some other family members visited this morning while she was sleeping – and she didn’t remember that they were there.
Cerwin and Doris, A blessing to see your care and honor